1 I Have the Key
Jesse called after his friend Edwin,“Hey, Edwin! Someone has stolen your treasure box. ”
Edwin smiled and said,“Don’t worry, John. I have the key. ”
我拿著鑰匙呢
傑西在他的朋友艾德文後麵高聲地叫著：“嗨，艾德文！有人把你的珠寶盒給偷走了。”
艾德文邊笑邊回答：“不要緊，我拿著盒子上的鑰匙呢。”
2 That’s What I Want to Find Out
“We have got a new dog, would you like to come around and play with him？”
“Well, I don’t know. Does he bite？”
“That’s what I want to find out. ”
那正是我想知道的
“我們新養了一條狗，你要過來和他玩玩嗎？”
“哦，我不知道。他咬人嗎？”
“這正是我想要知道的。”
3 My Dog Can’t Read
Mrs. Jack: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Jack: It’s no use, my little dog can’t read.
狗不識字
傑克夫人：哦，親愛的，我把最愛的小狗給丟了！
史密斯夫人：你該在報紙上登廣告啊！
傑克夫人：沒有用的，我的小狗不認識字。
4 Two Friends
“Sandy, please wait a minute! I wouldn’t say this to you, but now I can’t help it. You borrowed my umbrella three days ago, and haven’t returned it yet.”
“Oh, Jenny, I had no choice because it has been raining since then, you know.”
兩個朋友
“桑迪，請等一下！我不能不和你說一下了。三天前你就把我的傘借走了，可到現在你還沒有還呢。”
“哦，詹妮，我也沒辦法呀，你知道的，從那天起雨就一直在下。”
5 Who Is this Speaking
Mr. Marcus was in the hospital for a long time.
One night the phone rang at the nurses’station.
“How is Mr. Marcus？”the caller asked.
“He’s doing very well. In fact, he’s being discharged tomorrow. Who is this speaking？”
“This is Mr. Marcus—the doctors don’t tell me a thing.”
你是誰
馬庫斯先生住院很長時間了。
一天夜裏，護士站的電話鈴響了。
“馬庫斯先生還好嗎？”打電話的人問。
“他很好。事實上，他明天就可以出院了。你是誰？”
“我就是馬庫斯先生——醫生們什麼都不告訴我。”
6 Go Swimming
An American touring in the Sahara was dressed in a bathing suit. An Arabian gazed at him in amazement.
“I’m going swimming.”the tourist explained.
“But the ocean is five hundred miles away.”the Arab informed him.
“Five hundred miles!”the American exclaimed with a huge smile.“Boy, what a beach!”
去遊泳
一位美國遊客正身著泳裝在撒哈拉沙漠觀光。一個阿拉伯人驚奇地看著他。
“我要去遊泳。”遊客解釋說。
“可大洋還有500英裏遠。”阿拉伯人對他說。
“500英裏！”美國人笑著驚叫道，“小夥子，這是一個多麼大的海灘啊！”
7 What Do You Call Your Other Arm
I went to a restaurant one day recently wearing a shirt with the designer’s signature on the right sleeve.
As I stood in line to wait for a table, an elderly gentleman tapped me on the shoulder. Pointing to the label, he said,“Nice name.”Then, in a curious tone, he asked, “What do you call your other arm？”
另一隻手臂叫什麼名字
最近有一天，我穿著一件右邊袖子上有設計者簽名的襯衫去了一家餐館。
排隊等候空桌時，一位年長的先生拍了拍我的肩膀，指著簽名說：“好名字。”然後，他又好奇地問道：“你管另一隻手臂叫什麼？”
8 Tell the Difference
I stopped by a friend’s house the other day and found him stalking around with a flyswatter.
When I asked if he had gotten any flies, he answered,“Yeah, three males and two females. ”
Curious, I inquired as to how he could tell the difference.
He answered,“Three were on a beer can and two were on the phone. ”
區分不同
幾天前，我順便到一個朋友家拜訪，發現他正舉著蒼蠅拍四處拍打蒼蠅。
我問他是否拍到幾隻蒼蠅，他回答說：“拍到了，三隻公的，兩隻母的。”
出於好奇，我問他是怎麼區分的。
他回答說：“三隻趴在啤酒罐上，兩隻貼在電話機上。”
9 A Big Tiger
“Last week, ”Tom said to his friend Kenneth,“I went for a walk in a large park. The day was very cold, and the wind was blowing. Suddenly I saw a big tiger. ”
“What did you do？”asked Kenneth.
“I looked at him, put my hands into my pockets and went home.”answered Tom.
“Did it run after you？”asked Kenneth.
“Oh, no, it didn’t. You see, it was in the coop. ”
大老虎
“上星期，”湯姆對他的朋友肯尼斯說，“我在一個大公園裏散步。天冷風大。突然，我看到一隻大老虎。”
“你是怎麼做的呢？”肯尼斯問道。
“我看了看它，雙手插進口袋就回家去了。”湯姆答道。
“它追你了嗎？”肯尼斯又問道。
“噢，沒有。你明白，它是在籠子裏。”
10 Choice Questions
My husband took two Graduate Record Exams on the same day and came home exhausted from hours of answering multiple choice questions. He collapsed on the sofa.
His wife came to inform him that dinner was ready and asked if he would prefer water, lemonade or milk with his meal.
He paused for a moment and then replied,“I’ll take C, the milk. ”
選擇題
丈夫同一天參加了兩項研究生入學考試。幾個小時的多項選擇題使他筋疲力盡，回家後他癱倒在沙發上。
他的妻子走過來對他說，晚飯準備好了，問他吃飯時是想喝水、檸檬汁還是牛奶。
他停頓了一會兒，回答說：“我選C，牛奶。”
11 I Don’t Know
Blake: My wife doesn’t understand me, does yours？
John: I don’t know. I’ve never heard her even mention your name.
我不知道
布萊克：我妻子不理解我，你妻子呢？
約翰：我不知道，我從來沒聽她提起過你的名字。
12 Little Room
Billy checked into a hotel. But his wrath rose almost as soon as he left the desk.“I may be looked upon as a simple Irish lad from bogs, ”he roared to the porter who was carrying his bags,“but I’m not paying good money for a room no bigger than a cupboard with nothing but a little folding chair in it？”
“Please go in, sir. ”said the porter,“That’s a lift. ”
小房間
比利在一家旅館辦理了登記手續。但剛一離開服務台，他就火冒三丈。“你們竟敢把我當成從沼澤地裏來的愛爾蘭傻小子。”他對行李搬運工大聲吼道，“我可不會付高價來住這樣一個碗櫃大小、隻有一把小折椅的小房間！”
“請進來吧，先生，”行李搬運工說，“這是電梯。”
13 A Tip to Stay Awake
Tech support people like me spend our days on the phone with customers. Many like to chat while waiting for their computers to reboot. One man told me he’d been a long‐haul truck driver.“I’d love to drive a big rig,”I said,“but I’d worry about falling asleep at the wheel.”“Here’s a tip to stay awake. ”he offered,“Put a ＄100 bill in your left hand and hold it out of the window. ”