正文 第一章 火車票(1 / 3)

它身體上寫著漆黑醒目的“廣州—吉首”,它是一張火車票。

捏著它,我以為握住了一個傳奇的開始。

王家衛在他的《2046》中,肆意宣揚其關於尋找和遺忘、孤獨和溫暖的主題,而在今夜的N702上我所擁有的,隻是對鳳凰這座小城無限的想像。

窗外是黑沉沉的夜和野地,窗內是臥鋪車廂灰亮的燈光和列車服務員臃腫肥膩的身軀。這樣的情景,可以作為任何一出豔遇的開場。夜行的火車上,很容易就讓人混淆了時間和空間的概念。

此刻的自己,仿佛就是那夜奔的紅佛,懷揣著美好憧憬,投向一個夢想已久的地方。這種快樂是有顏色的,它以巨大的朱紅緊緊地包裹著我,讓我既興奮又透不過氣來。沒有什麼比“錦衣夜行”這四個字更令人魅惑了,這是一出又寂寞又美好的景象。我向來喜歡把在途中的時間拉得長一點,再長一點。在我的世界裏,人生最美好的當兒,盡在離開與到達之間。又好比愛情,最讓人心旌搖蕩、意亂神迷的時刻不過就是在那欲說還休、欲明還暗的時期。

但是,如今的交通還是太發達了。任你天涯海角,最多不過是幾天的飛機。我是極不喜歡飛機的,它太現代、太先進,以至於讓人失去了“人在旅途”的美好感覺。李白時期的“兩岸猿聲啼不住,輕舟已過萬重山”我們肯定是無從體驗了,沈從文先生《湘行散記》的那條征途,隻怕我們也很難得重新尋覓了。那麼我隻能選擇長途火車,也隻有這裏的長長過道和迷離夜燈,才能讓我有更豐裕的時間來享受旅途帶來的神秘誘惑及奢靡感官。

翻開那本爛熟的《湘行散記》,看沈先生的旅途生活,有水手,有星星,有小小的愉悅,也有絲絲的掛念,一切日子都那樣的清淺自然。對於沈先生來說,鳳凰是永遠的深根和鄉愁。去鳳凰,是回家,是尋根,是和自己的兒時少年重新照麵。於是,他可以從容地期待,喜悅地接受,家鄉的變與不變對他來說統共離不了一個“好”字。

在過去的二十多年裏,鳳凰於我不過是圖書、地圖中的星星點點,抑或是朋友家人口中傳頌的“邊城”,美是美,豔歸豔,但終究不過是別人筆下的傳說。總是不停地想像關於鳳凰的一切,它的山、它的水、它的路、它的人,在我的心中此間景象已有上千種組合。於久居鬧市的我來說,去鳳凰,是一種期待已久的尋覓和放逐,一次讓生活歸於平靜和完美的行走。我一如沈先生,可以喜悅地期待,從容地接受,鳳凰的古老和時尚對我來說統共也難離一個“好”字。

躺在轟轟隆隆的臥鋪上,看時光飛快地從窗外刮過,遙想當年沈先生躺在船艙裏看星星的情境,嘴邊滑過一絲微笑。

明天,肯定就是明天,我就能走天保、儺送曾經走過的路,坐翠翠曾經搖過的船、呼吸沈先生曾經呼吸過的空氣了。

這一切,真好!

Holding it,ihad a romantic whim thatihad

held a legendary story

A Ticket

It read, "Guangzhou to Jishou", in clear dark print. It was a train ticket.

Holding it, I had a romantic whim that I had held a legendary story.

2046 by Director Wong Kar-wai visualized a tone of quest and oblivion, loneliness and warmth. Tonight I was on board train N702, with unlimited imagination of Fenghuang, literally meaning phoenix, a small town thought to escape modernity and retain its idyllic beauty.

Outside the train window was pitch dark and wilderness in reverse. Inside the sleeping car the light was dim, with the occasional presence of the heavily-built, fat trainman or trainwoman. At this moment a romance might as well be struck up. Passengers on a moving train in the evening were easily under the spell of time and space confusion.

At this particular moment I embosomed the passion of an eloper who  fought against the social norms in the Tang Dynasty over a thousand  years ago, running for the place that I long dreamed of. Happiness had color - red, or even scarlet in its magnitude that tightly enclosed me  so much so that I could hardly breathe. "Night scroll in a brocaded  dress", a phrase of rich connotative lexical meaning and many literary references in Chinese, crept into my mind, arousing a mix of fear and itchy curiosity. It was an elusive moment of beautiful loneliness.