'You can't do it, you know,' said the human emporium of routes and fares at Cook's Cheapside branch.'It is so- ahem- so unusual.'
'Consult the police,' he concluded authoritatively, when Ipersisted.'We are not accustomed to taking travellers to the East End; we receive no call to take them there, and we know nothing whatsoever about the place at all.'
'Never mind that,' I interposed, to save myself from being swept out of the office by his flood of negations.'Here's something you can do for me.I wish you to understand in advance what I intend doing, so that in case of trouble you may be able to identify me.'
'Ah, I see; should you be murdered, we would be in position to identify the corpse.'
He said it so cheerfully and cold-bloodedly that on the instant Isaw my stark and mutilated cadaver stretched upon a slab where cool waters trickle ceaselessly, and him I saw bending over and sadly and patiently identifying it as the body of the insane American who would see the East End.
'No, no,' I answered; 'merely to identify me in case I get into a scrape with the "bobbies."' This last I said with a thrill; truly, Iwas gripping hold of the vernacular.
'That,' he said, 'is a matter for the consideration of the Chief Office.'
'It is so unprecedented, you know,' he added apologetically.
The man at the Chief Office hemmed and hawed.'We make it a rule,'
he explained, 'to give no information concerning our clients.'
'But in this case,' I urged, 'it is the client who requests you to give the information concerning himself.'
Again he hemmed and hawed.